Navigating an Alabama divorce without losing yourself in the process can be tricky. With so many moving parts, it is easy to become overwhelmed and lost. The good news is that planning for divorce can help you move through this significant life change more efficiently and with greater ease while increasing your chances of achieving your desired outcomes.Â
When you plan for divorce, you have a comprehensive and holistic roadmap to follow that covers three major areas: emotional clarity, financial preparation, and goal-setting. Because all three are necessary to build a solid foundation for post-divorce life, below is a more detailed discussion of these areas and strategies for succeeding in each category.
Divorce With Emotional Clarity
Emotional clarity during an Alabama divorce is a superpower, especially when emotions can lead you to make decisions you might not have made if you were more distanced from the situation. Is emotional clarity during divorce easy to achieve? No. Is it worth the effort? Absolutely.
So, how can you achieve emotional clarity when everything feels off-kilter? A few ways, actually. The first is to create distance between you and your spouse, even if you are still living under the same roof. This means calling a truce, even if your spouse won’t agree to one.
A truce is your commitment to not let yourself be provoked by your spouse or people in their camp that would cause your emotions to control your actions. This is what they would want because it can prevent you from thinking as clearly as you would while inhibiting your efforts to be intentional about your plan for divorce.
The second is to create distance between you and everything else so you can process that you are, in fact, getting a divorce. The divorce process can be a drain on your mental and physical strength, so you want to compose yourself as much as possible. You can accomplish this by carving out time and space for yourself every day to think, meditate, and relax.
The third and final way to help reach a state of emotional clarity is to enlist professional support. This support can come from a mental health professional (such as a psychiatrist, psychologist, or therapist), a divorce coach, or a member of the clergy. Beyond that, positive-minded family, friends, and support group members can also help guide you through your emotions.
Financially Plan for Divorce
Even before hiring an Alabama family law attorney, it can help to begin organizing your finances. Don’t fret if your finances are not currently in order; the most organized person who was also the spouse in charge of the household finances can still find the prospect overwhelming. For a person who is not organized and may not have access to many or any financial details, it can feel much more intimidating. Not to worry.
Understanding what information you are missing can be just as valuable since your family law attorney and potentially a forensic accountant will pursue what they need during discovery. In the meantime, knowing what to look for in a divorce can help with this part of your action plan. A checklist (like the checklist in this blog post) can also help keep you organized, demonstrating there is a method for what can feel like madness.
Once you consolidate the financial documents you need to divorce, you can move on to planning financially for your future. This, too, can feel daunting, but it often turns into the fun part of the divorce process (yes, I said fun) because you get to create your very own adventure. It’s no secret that divorce can worsen one’s financial position. However, depending on your goals, it can only be a temporary challenge. Speaking of goals, setting them is an integral part of divorce planning.
Set Goals for Your Divorce
The third and arguably most crucial part of your Alabama divorce plan is your outlook for the future. Much of this will rest on you because no one can tell you how you want to live. Here are some goals to consider setting (this is a guideline only):
Financial goals:
Do you have debt you want to pay off, retirement savings accounts you want to increase or have your sights set on purchasing a new home? What about that cruise you’ve been dreaming about? Whatever it is, set the goal and do what you need to achieve it. This could include reevaluating your …
Career goals:
Divorce is often a time when people upend other parts of their lives that weren’t serving them. If you are in a career you don’t like, want to supplement your income, go back to work after an extended period away, or step up the gas in your current career, you now have the opportunity. That is if you make it a goal for yourself. Say it out loud. Write it down. Work for it.
Parenting (and co-parenting goals):
Is your relationship with your spouse acrimonious? Is your relationship with your children currently strained as a result of your divorce, or anything else for that matter? Do you want to be the parent you always thought you’d be? Again, divorce is the perfect excuse to put into motion the intentions you have. If these, or any other parenting and co-parenting goals, are on your radar, make today the day you start changing the dynamic in those familial relationships in your life you feel you could give more to.
Relationship goals:
You know your existing marriage is over, and your partner is soon to no longer be your partner. But if the desire is yours, that partner doesn’t have to be the last one to come into your life. Divorced men and women often find love after their previous marriage, and if that interests you, set a goal for welcoming new romantic relationships into your life.
How to Find an Alabama Family Law Attorney to Help You Win a Divorce
Divorce equals change in so many ways, so many of them positive. But to make those positive changes, you first must tell yourself they exist.
At Summit Family Law, our team of family law attorneys doesn’t see divorce as an isolated event for our clients but as a starting point and springboard for the positive changes to come one day. With a divorce plan, one day could be as soon as today. Call our Huntsville or Birmingham offices or schedule a consultation.
